Friday, May 1, 2009

Goodbye Philippines hello again Belgium

Went out last Saturday. Kay despedida ni Piet. He’s been here for over a year charming everyone with his impeccable Bisaya and amusing us with his insightful observations about the paradoxes of Filipino culture. Last Saturday was time to bid Piet our farewell dance so to speak. Goodbye Philippines hello again Belgium. He said it’ll hit him when he’s gone. Enjoy the frietjes en apples and fresh milk and pretty spring Piet and see you in Brugge soon. Your diverse life experiences in Europe, Africa and Asia will now make you an anthropologist to contend with! ;-)

The highlight of the despedida night was probably the smug PBA players inside 183 bar. The giants were sitting on bar stools at the farthest end of the bar. Two men (attendants?) were shooing in sexy tipsy girls to talk to them. The most daring female fans approached the basketball players for autographs or to chat and slow dance with them. Our group was dancing three meters away rolling our eyes and shaking our heads at the exchanges between the players basking in the attentions of the heavily made up skimpily clad chicks. Rachel, Emery, Ria and I were incensed by their hip shaking, booty-grabbing, French kissing. What’s so likable about all muscles, no brains? Besides these men are married for chrissakes!

Come to think of it, a friend who’s the owner of the most popular sleazy/sexy bar in town says 90 percent of his male customers are married. Big shots in politics and business who every now and then come to enjoy ogling at the naked female dancers.

I remember asking one of my happily married female colleagues who’s always holding hands with her husband if she's sure he doesn't sometimes fool around. She shrugged and said males sometimes need to visit bars like that because they're males. So she lets him. But she’s quite sure he doesn’t have paid sex with them. (Aw. Just WATCH but don’t TOUCH diay.)

Frits thinks I’m a man-hater because of all my blogs on dishonest men. Understand though that it’s hard to ignore such a right-in-your-face problem that my female friends have to deal with every day (and vice versa; male friends too. Let’s be gender fair.)

Experts on relationships say humans are not built to be monogamous. (Polygamy is human nature. Monogamy is a new invention.) People fall in and out of love and only the most committed survive unscathed by the jealousy, adultery, boredom that plague other relationships. With the work I do, it’s not uncommon to meet males with more than one wife as is allowed by their religion. Probably nothing wrong with that but I wonder how can a man possibly equally love two women with the same intensity?

As soon as VIEWFINDER begins we’ll be sure to explore all the angles to polygamy – why it suits some but plenty not. Just like that Oprah show where she invited couples in all sorts of polygamous relationships to talk about what works and doesn’t work for them. Mind blowing discussions. Wish VIEWFINDER could be like that.


Pieter said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Pieter said...

Hey Maya!

Thanks for the post on your blog (although most of it is, again, about dishonest men, hehe ;) hey, I don't think you've heard the full story about that night by the way. After fighting over the attention of the basketball players, the girls in 183 started fighting each other in the street (seriously). It was a weird sight, a group of 5 or 6 girls punching each other and pulling hair. I was a bit appalled by the reaction of the other people I must say. The guards just threw them out on the street and everyone was laughing and cheering as the girls were fighting. Perhaps that may be a topic of your next post: why do girls go after married guys up till the point of fighting each other over them?



partyphile said...

hello maya.

welcome to edge. loved ypou article. hehe. wish i could write as well as you.

zhaun (confessions of a partyphile)

Keith said...

Gutentag, Maya. I am looking at this article, and am pleased to know I am not implicated by it.... You are a delightful author. Just knowing what you taught makes me want to argue the article with you.

But alas, I have to refrain. I do not feel so ready to parry with you.

I hope all is well with you. I did enjoy my time in Indonesia. Though I really could not see Davao (2000 km) I was in a grocery where I could smell the durian hanging in netted bags near the elevator.

With my neuromuscular problems, many believe my traveling days are done.... I do believe I will see Indonesia, and certainly Mindanao again.

In my love life, I will also maintain my fidelity to my partner in balance to your article. Keep smiling.

Keith A. Stahr

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Anonymous said...

may, pag mubalik na ang Viewfinder, I'd like to join the discussion on Polygamy. I have a lot to share. hehe... -Krizza